The flower – keep your eyes wide…

One day the Buddha held up a flower in front of an audience of 1,250 monks and nuns. He did not say anything for quite a long time. The audience was perfectly silent. Everyone seemed to be thinking hard, trying to see the meaning behind the Buddha’s gesture.

Then, suddenly, the Buddha smiled. He smiled because someone in the audience smiled at him and at the flower. The name of that monk was Mahakashyapa. He was the only person who smiled, and the Buddha smiled back and said, “I have a treasure of insight, and I have transmitted it to Mahakashyapa.”

That story has been discussed by many generations of Zen students, and people continue to look for its meaning. To me the meaning is quite simple. When someone holds up a flower and shows it to you, he wants you to see it. If you keep thinking, you miss the flower. The person who was not thinking, who was just himself, was able to encounter the flower in depth, and he smiled.

That is the problem of life. If we are not fully ourselves, truly in the present moment, we miss everything. When a child presents himself to you with his smile, if you are not really there—thinking about the future or the past, or preoccupied with other problems—then the child is not really there for you. The technique of being alive is to go back to yourself in order for the child to appear like a marvelous reality. Then you can see him smile and you can embrace him in your arms.

~ Thich Nhat Hanh

Thoughts: Timing, and moving from there to here

“We often forget that we are as we are until we’re not. We are the same until we’re changed. We can move that a bit further by putting into place healthy habits and to show up to our lives in a way that fosters growth, but we can’t game timing.

“Timing is the one thing that we often forget to surrender to.

“Things are dark until they’re not. Most of our unhappiness stems from the belief that our lives should be different than they are. We believe we have control — and our self-loathing and self-hatred comes from this idea that we should be able to change our circumstances, that we should be richer or hotter or better or happier. While self-responsibility is empowering, it can often lead to this resentment and bitterness that none of us need to be holding within us. We have to put in our best efforts and then give ourselves permission to let whatever happens to happen–and to not feel so directly and vulnerably tied to outcomes. Opportunities often don’t show up in the way we think they will.

“You don’t need more motivation or inspiration to create the life you want. You need less shame around the idea that you’re not doing your best. You need to stop listening to people who are in vastly different life circumstances and life stages than you tell you that you’re just not doing or being enough. You need to let timing do what it needs to do. You need to see lessons where you see barriers. You need to understand that what’s right now becomes inspiration later. You need to see that wherever you are now is what becomes your identity later.

“Sometimes we’re not yet the people we need to be in order to contain the desires we have. Sometimes we have to let ourselves evolve into the place where we can allow what we want to transpire.”

~ Jamie Varon

Doing Business: Does your company really want to hang out with me?

Surprise...
Surprise…

Does your company really want to hang out with me?
by Derek Sivers

Imagine you have a crush on a girl at the bank.

Every time you talk, it’s only business.

But one day she says, “Here’s my cellphone number. Call anytime.”

Wow! She likes you!

You call her and ask her out. She says OK.

You meet up for dinner and after talking for 15 minutes she says, “Could I interest you in a home equity loan?”

Arrgh! That’s worse than if she had never given you her number in the first place!

The fact that she only wants to talk about her business proves that not only is she not interested in you, but she was trying to trick you.

Now you’re insulted and will never go to that bank again, or at least never believe it when they pretend to care about you.

This is what’s happening with most companies’ “Social Media Strategy”.

They’re acting like they want to connect directly with you, get to know you, or hang out where you hang out.

But unless they learn how to stop selling, listen, and be real – they’re just permanently alienating potential crushes.

Shared with permission/original, and Derek’s other essays: http://sivers.org/sms